Just Deception

I spend my time
shamanizing everything
Floating conversations like
Breadcrumbs on soup
Nah! I don’t wanna change
I wanna like myself
When I change
Others might like me instead
But have I changed
And what has it got me?
Do you see a new line
Upon my face every year?
My mother refuses to relax
She says she’s preparing for death
And I alone carry stories
Of what might have been
I spend more time
Describing how I spend time
Thinking up more ways of description
Oh, it sure feels good
Even if it’s all just deception